Today, I was going about my Saturday afternoon business, on my way to the library with a stack of books tucked in one arm. A man tooled up alongside me on his bicycle.
I gave him the side eye, trying to divine his intentions.
“How are you, Miss? Do you like movies?”
I considered this question. Yes, I do like movies. But, I hate how answering this question in the affirmative often leads the asker into believing that I would like to see a movie with him, when in fact, most of the time, I would not.
He pedaled next to me at a painstakingly slow pace as he launched into a spiel about how he gets new movies so if I was interested, or my friends, he could get me new movies, .. or something.
“So, you like movies?” he asked again.
I gestured toward my arm load of books, not wanting to encourage him it what was likely an illegal venture. “I like to read.”
“Ok. So, you want my number?”
“Um.” (awkard laugh) “No? Thanks?”
“Are you sure? I can give you my number, you can get new movies fast!”
“No, it’s ok, I’ll just..read.”
“Ok. Thanks Miss have a nice day!” his words trailed behind him as he pedaled off to his next customer.
This reminded me of a random mini-encounter that happened a few weeks ago when I was walking to my bank, which is a couple blocks away. A man was bicycling the opposite direction that I was walking, and as I looked about, we made what should have been meaningless, routine eye contact. Apparently, he read into it far more than I, as lo and behold Bicycle Man about-faced and was suddenly at my side, commenting on the weather and asking after my welfare. I responded politely until he asked me out, at which point I just said, “No. Cut it out.” Really. What makes a random bicyclist who had to have been at LEAST 40 think he has enough game to pick up a random chick walking down the street? Just no. It’s not going to happen.